How To Cope With Job Loss

Speak from the heart and try to answer this question: “What do you do?”

Many of us may respond to this query by elaborating on our professions. I would do the same thing too. You see, our jobs are deeply integrated into our identities. Work helps us to satisfy our needs to earn money, to achieve goals, and to connect with others. It gives a sense of purpose and greatly affects our means of living. Therefore, job loss can be overwhelming.

It is common to feel like a part of you was lost. This loss can take a toll on your mental and physical health. As you through the process of adjustment, the next phase needs to be intentional. Let this article help you with that. Here are some of the steps that you may take after losing your job.

GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO GRIEVE AND ADJUST

The latest figures released by the Ministry of Manpower (MOM) showed an increase in the country’s annual unemployment rate. The overall Annual Average Unemployment Rate in 2020 was 3%, compared to 2.3% in 2019. Many people have experienced unemployment during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Adjusting to unemployment and grieving over job loss takes time. If you recently lost your job, it is important to accept that the process cannot be rushed. Rushing your feelings may lead to projecting unpleasant emotions during a job interview. Let everything simmer down first.

Losing your job may feel the same way as losing an integral part of yourself. You will undergo the grieving process and may feel the following stages: denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and acceptance. Do not be too hard on yourself. Accepting that these changes take time can help ease the healing process.

CHANGE YOUR MINDSET

There are two ways to perceive your current situation. In most cases, losing your job or your source of income is difficult. Whether it has something to do with your performance or with the current economic situation, it is normal to feel worried about the future after job loss.

You can either look at it as a career barrier or a temporary setback. If you look at things in a bird’s eye view, you will realize that success in life is measured by how we respond to its challenges and setbacks. It is up to you to alter your mindset.

PRIORITIZE SELF-CARE

At first, taking care of yourself is easier said than done. It is tempting to grab a bag of chips and wallow in self-pity as you sit in front of the television. The feelings you may experience in the first couple of weeks or months may be overwhelming. However, you must not neglect your own well-being.

The healing of your mental health requires physical resilience. It takes a lot of effort to take care of yourself and to build healthy habits that will keep your immune system strong. Start by being intentional with what you eat. You may even grow your own greens at home. Furthermore, you can plan out an exercise routine that will work best for you. Use your energy to fulfill productive tasks such as gardening and job hunting.

SEEK SOCIAL SUPPORT

As you are dealing with a range of emotions, refrain from isolating yourself. Having social support is crucial in times of struggle. It will help you overcome the loneliness you feel during the grieving process. Moreover, talking to someone about your current situation will help you acknowledge your feelings.

Talk to the people whom you trust. Your confidant does not have to offer upfront solutions, he or she just needs to be a good listener. Good listeners listen actively without passing judgment or being distracted. Alternatively, you may join support groups online.

ESTABLISH A DAILY ROUTINE

Maintaining a daily routine goes together with taking care of yourself. While it is possible for you to stay in bed the whole day, setting a regular schedule can help regulate your mood. Studies have shown that following a routine can help ward off depression. A routine will give you a sense of purpose and accomplishment as you complete your daily household tasks. Furthermore, not setting boundaries for yourself may lead to eating poorly or other unhealthy habits.

Write down the tasks that you aim to fulfill within the day. Maintain a body clock by setting up a timer. The timer will give you an external cue to wake up and to sleep on scheduled hours. This will help you create a sense of normalcy and prevent you from staying up all night. Additionally, you may incorporate your meal preparations, family visits, skin care regimens, and exercise plans within your daily routine. Remember that practicing self-care and maintaining good hygiene can help boost your mood.

SET LIMITS ON YOUR JOB SEARCH

Try not to add unnecessary pressure on yourself! You are already going through a lot. Despite how anxious you are to get a new job, spending all your time on job search can be stressful and frustrating. Know that you are doing your best.

Try setting aside a certain number of hours within a day for your job applications. The remaining parts of your day may be dedicated to self-care, taking care of your family, and to other productive tasks. The unexpected time off can be challenging, but you may use it as an opportunity to do something that you have always been busy for.

Image Credits: pixabay.com

What are some of the things that you have put aside because you were too busy with your job? Whether you want to learn a new language or to clean out your closet, find hobbies and projects that will occupy your time. Now is your chance to focus on the things you are passionate about!

Sources: 1, 2, 3, & 4

Read More...

Why Rewarding Yourself Is Important

John Maxwell once said: “Everybody wants money, yet seldom will anyone budget or control their spending.”

Setting financial goals is an easy task! Reaching these goals is another story. You may intend to purchase your first designer bag or to go back to school this year, but you are still building your funds for it. Moreover, you may have set some financial goals that are harder than you anticipated. Putting these goals into action is the first hurdle that you have to pass.

The second hurdle is reaching the finish line without losing your motivation. The solution to your problem is placing an efficient reward system. Rewards and actions have close association. Think about it! You perform an action expecting an outcome or a reward in the end. Though rewards do now always show up as a trophy, you can expect some form of return. Every time you receive a reward, your body releases a neurotransmitter called the dopamine. It plays important roles in executive functions, motor control, motivation, arousal, reinforcement, and reward. It also plays a role in lower-level functions including lactation, sexual gratification, and nausea. Simply put, it affects how we feel pleasure.

Dopamine spikes in your brain when something important is about to happen. It gives you a surge of pleasure as you finish a task. In turn, it increases your motivation and productivity. Use this knowledge to your advantage. Give yourself small rewards along the way to achieve a bigger goal. You may indulge at the end of the month by rewarding yourself with 5% of your hard-earned savings. Use this money to get a well-deserved treat after the whole month’s work. It will surely keep you going!

As long as you set aside a responsible amount of money, take your mind off the expenses that come with your small reward. Relax! Take these suggestions:

1. Take yourself out to breakfast or brunch.
2. Read a book for 15–30 minutes.
3. Watch an episode of your favorite Netflix series.
4. Listen to your favorite playlist for 15 minutes.
5. Buy a delicious dessert.
6. Enjoy an at-home spa day.
7. Paint, sew, or knit something.
8. Turn off your devices for an hour.
9. Indulge in a long shower.
10. Diffuse your favorite essential oils.
11. Write in your journal.
12. Watch the sunset.
13. Jog for 15-30 minutes.
14. Get a new water bottle.
15. Get a manicure or a pedicure.

Every action is tied to some outcome. The problem is, the result is not always immediate. You will not lose weight overnight. You will lose body fat over time. While waiting, you may lose the motivation to keep going. Hence, putting a simple reward system may help.

Rewards can act as psychological enforcers when you use it as a means of motivation to reach a particular goal. When done right, the natural process in the brain can be used to help you stay on track with your financial goals. The magnitude of the reward is not directly proportional to motivation. Even the smallest treats can get you pumped up for the rest of the month. Use the abovementioned list as a guide to help you put your reward system in place.

Sources: 1 & 2

Read More...

What To Do When You Feel That You’re Not Good Enough

Your heart is racing. You wanted to say something during an important meeting at work. As you open your mouth, an inner critic stumbles you with doubts. “What if you are wrong?”, says the voice inside you. You saved yourself from embarrassment by keeping your mouth shut. You felt that you were not good enough.

Moreover, you want to ask your longtime partner to take the next step. Something inside you keeps you from taking action. You doubt that she will agree. When doubts brew, you tend to fear the outcome and undermine your abilities. Self-doubt will stop you from reaching your goals. Identifying these false beliefs is the first step to eliminating them.

Believing in yourself is essential in reaching your dreams. On that note, here are some things that you can do when you feel that you are not good enough.

#1: QUIT COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS

My uncle usually stresses how comparison is the thief of all joy. We get so caught up in comparing our lives with everyone else’s highlight moments. This is the reason why we struggle with insecurities. It is important to know that the people you compare yourself to compare themselves to other people too. These people may seem to have it all but, they do not!

They are beautifully imperfect human beings going through the same challenges as you. Instead of comparing yourself to others, you must try to connect with others. Connecting with others can be as simple as greeting your neighbors. Be kind without being submissive. You do not have to agree with others all the time. Everyone has a right to their own perspective and opinion.

#2: KNOW THAT YOUR MIND CAN BE VERY CONVINCING

Do not believe everything you think. There are times when your brain may trick you into thinking that you are less capable of what you can accomplish. Notice your thoughts. It is unhealthy to give so much power to the negative ones. Instead, you must train your inner critic to shift into a coach that challenges you to be better.

Encourage yourself to transform the negative thoughts into positive thoughts. If you do not deem yourself to be worthy, you will deprive yourself of many opportunities.

#3: BELIEVE THAT THERE IS MORE RIGHT WITH YOU THAN WRONG

Jon Kabat-Zinn once said: “Until you stop breathing, there’s more right with you than wrong with you.” You are a testament of how beautiful life can be. There are lots of things in your life that most people pray for.

Identify the internal and external qualities that you like about yourself. This will help you put things into perspective. For starters, you are alive and are able to create new paths whenever you choose to.

#4: NOTICE THE POWER OF YOUR SCARS

Your past experiences shape who you are today. Moreover, your scar is a symbol of your strength. It is a reminder of whatever hurt you has now healed. Be proud of the scars that life has left you with. You conquered the pain and grew stronger on the other side.

Accept what you have gone through and appreciate the lessons you have learned along the way. If you have an opportunity to talk about your scars or to share your wisdom to others, do so.

#5: EMBRACE FAILURES AND MISTAKES

Failures are necessary in life. The mistakes during your first year at work help you become more successful during your second year. Failure helps us to be more compassionate, empathic, and kind to others. Without failure, we would not grow. It is through our failures that we learn the greatest lessons that life has to offer. These struggles help us to appreciate our successes.

“Just because you fail once, doesn’t mean you’re gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don’t, then who will, sweetie?” -Marilyn Monroe

#6: MAKE PEACE WITH THE NOW AND ACCEPT YOUR PAST

If you do not accept your past and make peace with the present, you will not be able to enjoy your future. As you make changes in your life and reach for the next step in the professional or personal ladder, you must acknowledge the importance of being appreciative with where you are now.

Image Credits: unsplash.com

Life is a journey. It is up to you to walk towards something you feel rewarding and satisfying. Know that you are good enough!

Sources: 1 & 2

Read More...

How To Master The Art Of Giving Speeches

For some people, merely thinking about public speaking can cause their palms to sweat. It is one of the most common fears out there. However, there are many ways to overcome your fear and deliver a memorable speech. Here are some useful tips.

#1: DO YOU KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE?

Know the reason why you are asked to talk in a room full of people. Identify your audience. It is important to identify your audience to know what they want or need to take away from your speech. If you are speaking in front of your friends at a wedding, entertain them. If you are speaking in front of your co-workers, inspire them.

#2: HAVE YOU REHEARSED?

Make time to practice your speech. Write down your goals and the content of your speech ahead of time. This will ensure that your muscle memory will work while you deliver your speech. Try practicing despite having different distractions to mimic real-life situations.

#3: WHICH STYLE WORKS FOR YOU?

While others may benefit from having their script memorized, some may perform better with a few notes on a paper. Different events will usually require a different style. Know which style works for you.

#4: HAVE YOU TESTED ALL THE EQUIPMENT?

Nothing is more frustrating than last-minute technical difficulties. Avoid adding more stress to your day by testing all the equipment and audio visual presentations ahead of time. It is best to have backups too.

#5: HOW DID YOU USE YOUR BODY LANGUAGE?

The right physical or non-verbal communication can have a profound impact on how your message is interpreted and received. Be aware of your body language! For instance, you must make eye contact. Face your audience and stand straight. Avoid crossing your arms or putting your hands in your pockets.

#6: DID YOU GRAB ATTENTION?

Grab attention by refraining from starting a speech with what today’s talk is about. Instead, use an interesting anecdote or a shocking statistic to kick things off. Conclude your speech with a summary and a strong statement that your audience will remember.

#7: HAVE YOU TRIED ENJOYING THE EXPERIENCE?

Image credits: unsplash.com

Fake it until you make it. If you look bored, then the audience will think that you not interesting. Exude confidence by adding a little humor (i.e., as long as it is appropriate) and interesting anecdotes. This will help you and your audience relax. Remember to eliminate sentences that does not clearly support your purpose. Remember that it is not about you, it is about your audience.

Sources: 1 & 2

 

Read More...

How To Increase Motivation At Work

With the multitude of global issues that we are facing right now, it is normal to experience burnout. Motivation is the drive that conquers burnout. Self-motivation is having the initiative to do a task without being supervised or being told to do it.

Think of two things you like doing and two things you do not like doing. From this simple exercise, you will realize which activities motivate you. Motivation drives our behaviors and there are two primary types of it. These are external and internal motivation.

With external motivation, you are doing something because the activity will bring some reward or benefit at the end of it.

For instance, you may visualize the act of job hunting. It is not something you do to pastime. People job hunt because they want an outcome – a job. The motivation for actually working is also usually external. We are motivated to go to work because we are paid to do so.

In contrast, internal motivation entails doing something purely because you love doing it. The more internally motivated an action is, the more enjoyable it usually is. So from the point of view of happiness, it makes sense to have more internally motivated activities in your life. People who are internally motivated show more interest and excitement over what they do. You are usually better at internally motivated actions too. You show more persistence and creativity. You are likely to have increased happiness and self-esteem by pursuing what internally motivates you.

Think about some of the things you do on a regular basis. Are you mostly externally motivated, acting in for the rewards? Or are you mostly internally motivated? It is important to know which type of motivation is strongest for you. If you follow this, your performance will likely improve and you will generally be happier.

DEVELOPING INTERNAL MOTIVATION

With the bulk of tasks we have to finish in a day, do not expect everything to be internally motivated. Internal motivation is developed and maintained when we are autonomous, competent, and supported.

We feel autonomous when we can make our own choices and decisions.
We feel competent when we know that we can do things.
We feel supported when we are connected to others.

BECOMING MORE COMPETENT

1. Practice what you need to do or perform beforehand.

2. Look for positive feedback, but value constructive criticisms. Your motivation will become stronger if you can find some way of getting positive feedback on your progress.

3. Break down your tasks and goals. If a task is very complex and challenging, breaking it down can help you stay motivated. It makes things more sustainable and attainable.

4. Make sure the difficulty level matches your ability. You want your goals and activities to be reasonable. It should not be too easy, because you will get bored. It should not be too difficult, because you will get frustrated.

KNOWING THE PITFALL OF EXCUSES

Unsuccessful people often have good reasons for not hitting their goals. Successful people use those same reasons as their motivation. Practice transforming your excuses into motivations. Here are some examples:

1. I can not give up. I have to do this for my children.

2. I have to study harder, so that I can properly teach my students.

Image Credits: unsplash.com

What are you hustling for? Motivation is strongest when it comes from within. Let me close by highlighting what Don Wilder once said: “Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure.” Build a house that you deserve.

Read More...