Who doesn’t love a little treat-yourself moment? Whether it’s a shiny new gadget or that perfect pair of shoes, shopping can feel like an instant mood boost. But when those quick dopamine hits turn into a habit that strains your wallet (and maybe your peace of mind), it might be time to hit pause.
If you’ve ever felt the magnetic pull of an online sale at 2 am, you’re not alone. The good news? You can take back control without giving up all the joy of shopping. Here are some real-life, practical ways to help yourself prevent or curb a shopping addiction.
KNOW YOUR TRIGGERS
Are you more likely to shop when you’re stressed? Bored? Celebrating? Identify the feelings or situations that nudge you toward clicking “Add to Cart.” When you know your triggers, you can start swapping impulse buys for healthier coping mechanisms like journaling, walking, or calling a friend.
PAUSE BEFORE YOU PURCHASE
Impulse buys are sneaky. Next time you’re tempted, try the 48-hour rule: wait two days before buying something non-essential. This cooling-off period can help you decide if it’s a genuine want or just a fleeting whim.
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UNSUBSCRIBE AND UNFOLLOW
Those endless emails screaming “FLASH SALE!” aren’t doing you any favors. Take a few minutes to unsubscribe from marketing emails and unfollow brands that constantly tempt you. Out of sight, out of cart.
SET SMALL GOALS
Challenge yourself to a no-spend weekend or a month of mindful shopping. When you hit a milestone, reward yourself with something non-material. Think a DIY spa day or a movie marathon!
MAKE BUDGETING FUN
Create a fun money fund! Allocating a small, guilt-free budget for treats can help you enjoy shopping in moderation while keeping your finances in check.
BE KIND TO YOURSELF
Slipping up doesn’t mean you’ve failed. Recognize progress over perfection. Every mindful decision you make is a step toward a healthier relationship with spending.
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At the end of the day, it’s not about depriving yourself—it’s about finding balance. You deserve joy that lasts longer than the delivery rush. So, what step will you take today?
Money has a way of tugging at our emotions…sometimes even breaking us down. Recently, I found myself in tears over an academic setback. I had poured a significant amount of money into my studies, only to face disappointing results at the final dissertation stage. The thought of spending even more to fix the situation felt overwhelming.
Negative emotions tied to money can easily spiral into despair, but managing these feelings is essential. Start by examining the impact of your emotions.
#1: EXAMINE THE IMPACT OF YOUR EMOTIONS
Intense emotions aren’t always bad. My initial reaction to failing or needing to revise my dissertation wasn’t “wrong.” Big emotions often mean we’re deeply invested in our lives. However, letting emotions spiral unchecked can wreak havoc on your personal and professional life. When money-related stress takes over, it can lead to:
Strained relationships
Trouble at work or school
Emotional outbursts
Reliance on unhealthy coping mechanisms
Take a moment to reflect. Are your emotions affecting your daily life? Identifying these triggers helps you turn emotions into tools for growth and motivation instead of barriers.
#2: IDENTIFY SPECIFIC NEGATIVE FEELINGS ABOUT MONEY
Our emotional connections to money often run deep, even if we don’t realize it. Start by journaling about your feelings toward debt, spending, and saving. Ask yourself:
Does your debt make you feel trapped or ashamed?
Do unplanned purchases leave you feeling guilty?
Does budgeting feel suffocating, triggering anxiety or conflict?
Unpacking these emotions can help uncover their root causes. Once you know what’s driving your feelings, you’re better equipped to change them.
#3: PRACTICE EMOTIONAL REGULATION
There’s no switch to turn off negative emotions, but you can learn to regulate them. Bottling up feelings can harm your mental and physical health, causing:
Anxiety or depression
Sleep disturbances
Chronic stress
Muscle tension and pain
Instead, aim for balance. Allow yourself to feel emotions without judgment. Acknowledge them, let them flow, and then refocus. This practice prevents overwhelm without forcing you to suppress how you feel.
#4: REPLACE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS WITH POSITIVE ONES
Once you’ve identified the negative emotions tied to money, work on replacing them with empowering ones. For instance, if debt makes you feel ashamed, strive to feel motivated instead.
Affirmations can help. Start with phrases like:
“I am in control of my finances.” “I attract opportunities for financial growth.”
It might feel awkward at first, but over time, these affirmations can reshape your mindset and help you feel more confident about money matters.
#5: BUILD RELIABLE FINANCIAL SYSTEMS
Systems can take some of the emotional weight out of managing money. Small steps like setting up autopay for bills, automating savings, or enabling low-balance alerts can make a world of difference.
However, don’t “set and forget” your finances. Schedule a weekly check-in to calmly review your financial situation. This routine helps you stay proactive and prevents money worries from spiraling.
#6: JOIN A FINANCIAL SUPPORT GROUP
Money stress is incredibly common, yet many people avoid seeking help. Luckily, online resources make support more accessible than ever.
Consider exploring:
Financial literacy courses, like those FREE from the Institute for Financial Literacy
Budgeting communities on social media
Credit counseling services, such as CCS.org.sg
Being part of a positive, informed community can help you develop a healthier relationship with money. Remember, you’re not alone—sharing your challenges and successes makes the journey less isolating.
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Dealing with negative emotions about money takes time, self-awareness, and intentional action. By reflecting on your feelings, building solid financial habits, and leaning on support systems, you can turn money from a source of stress into a tool for growth.
Understanding your financial personality can help you make better money decisions. Here are four common types and some tips for each:
#1: CONFIDENT MONEY MANAGER
You’re excited about managing your finances and likely a long-term thinker and planner. You prefer traditional strategies like having a retirement savings plan and planning future investments. However, you might struggle with seeking a second opinion, moving too quickly, or overanalyzing options.
Questions to ask yourself:
1. Do I regularly review and update my financial plans?
2. How comfortable am I making investment decisions on my own?
3. Do I have a detailed retirement savings plan?
4. How often do I seek advice on financial decisions?
#2: SHORT-TERM STRATEGIST
You’re a careful planner who does thorough research, often taking your time to make well-informed decisions. Flexible and adaptable, you focus on short-term goals rather than long-term ones like retirement. As a strategist, you might miss opportunities by over-evaluating options. Creating timelines or automating finances can help.
Questions to ask yourself:
1. How often do I adjust my budget based on changing situations?
2. Am I more focused on immediate needs than long-term goals?
3. Am I comfortable researching before making financial decisions?
4. How frequently do I automate my savings?
#3: VALUE-BASED PLANNER
You’re future-oriented, charitable, and make financial decisions based on your values. You prioritize donating to charities but may neglect your own daily finances. Consider working with a financial advisor to stay on top of your finances.
Questions to ask yourself:
1. How often do I prioritize charitable donations in my financial planning?
2. Do my financial goals align with my values?
3. Am I proactive about supporting causes that matter to me?
4. How regularly do I review my daily finances?
#4: LAID-BACK BALANCER
You have a relaxed approach to money, prioritizing living your life and intuition over strict budgeting. You keep an eye on your money but may not be up-to-date. Financial planners and advisors can help. It’s important to stay informed and set future goals. Budgeting apps for beginners can make this easier.
Questions to ask yourself:
1. How comfortable am I without a strict budget?
2. Do I rely more on intuition than planning?
3. How often do I review my overall financial status?
4. Am I open to using budgeting apps to track my finances?
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SIMPLIFIED CATEGORIES
If you find these categories complex, consider these simplified types by Dean Deutz, a private wealth consultant at RBC Wealth Management:
A. Savers: Prioritize saving now to enjoy financial security later, often paying off debts like mortgages early. They should balance caution with potential high-return investments, seeking diversified portfolios that align with their long-term goals.
B. Spenders: Enjoy their money presently, often borrowing and saving less. Spenders benefit from reducing discretionary spending to increase savings and build emergency funds for future financial stability.
C. Sharers: Enjoy sharing money with family, friends, charities, or their community. They should manage their generosity wisely, setting clear boundaries and budgets to sustain their giving while ensuring their own financial health.
Understanding your financial personality can clarify your decisions, reveal patterns in your financial habits, and highlight areas for improvement to achieve greater financial well-being over time.
This may sound like a grandiose statement, but it’s true. Your thoughts, beliefs, and emotions profoundly shape the world around you.
Have you ever noticed how one negative thought can ripple outward and influence everything in your life? Or that a positive outlook can bring more opportunities your way?
This is because your inner state of being is intimately connected to the external reality you experience. Your internal state doesn’t just affect the way others perceive you; it affects the way reality is presented to you.
Defining your inner state of being and external reality
You are an epistemological subject, which means you’re capable of understanding and constructing your reality.
Your external identity is how others see you; it’s the person they talk to, the face they recognize, and the behavior they observe.
Your external reality is composed of a physical environment, your body, and your place in it. All of these aspects are influenced by your inner state of being—how you perceive and think about the world.
Your inner world—what lies within you—is a projection of that state. It isn’t something we can change by physically rearranging things; instead, it comes from within us, often in the form of emotions or feeling states.
Your internal state affects how you interact with the outside world—the way you communicate with people, respond to changes in environment or life circumstances and ultimately shape your external reality according to that perception.
If we focus on our well-being—our thoughts and emotions—we can create an internal state that fosters a positive connection with our external reality. So next time you think about how “life happens” to you, remember that it may be happening because of you.
The relationship between your internal and external worlds
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So what do they have to do with each other?
Well, think of it this way: life is a mirror that reflects your inner world—where you are on the inside directly influences your external conditions.
That means if you’re feeling low on motivation and enthusiasm for life, it will be hard to achieve something great externally; and if you’re feeling happy and content internally, chances are you will discover a lot of joy in life!
By taking care of your inner state first—bringing yourself into balance through self-care like regular exercise or meditation—you will start to see real changes in your outer world too.
Understanding the power of your thoughts and beliefs
Do you want to create a more positive and meaningful external reality?
The first step is understanding the power of your thoughts and beliefs. Think of your thoughts as seeds, they are the foundation of everything you do and shape the direction of your life.
Positive thoughts create hope, joy, and optimism, while negative thoughts lead to fear, doubt, and sadness. You must take control of your thinking so you can create a life that brings greater fulfillment and satisfaction.
Here are ways to start:
Become aware of your current thoughts.
Observe what ideas come up when you’re faced with a challenge. Take time to be mindful of what is going on in your head and notice if it is helping or hindering progress toward your goals.
Challenge unproductive beliefs.
Identify any negative or overly pessimistic thoughts that don’t serve you, such as “I can’t do this” or “I’ll never be successful”. Replace these with more empowering messages such as “I can achieve this” or “I am capable of great things”.
Be intentional with self-talk.
Practice encouragingly talking to yourself so that it helps build confidence and faith in yourself instead of creating doubts and anxieties.
Your ‘inner state of being’ has great influence over what happens on the outside, so take some time to align it with your desired outcomes.
Strengthening body-mind connection
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You can start to take steps towards improving your body-mind connection by practicing mindfulness and being conscious of the connection between your inner world and your external world.
Meditation is a great way to achieve this because it helps to keep you grounded while also helping to bring out positive feelings. With consistent practice, you can start to become aware of how your inner state of being is linked to external reality. This awareness can be incredibly powerful and can transform your life in many ways.
By strengthening your body-mind connection, you will begin to experience more contentment and improved well-being. Practicing meditation and mindfulness can help you develop a better understanding of yourself, which leads to more confidence in who you are and what you do—and how that is reflected in the reality around you.
Ultimately, it’s good to understand that our inner state of being, our thoughts, and our emotions all have a powerful effect on our external reality. The way we think, feel, and treat ourselves influences the way we show up in our relationships and our career. Our inner world is the foundation of our outer world, and we must take the time to nurture and care for our inner selves. When we do, we create a strong foundation for creating our dream life and living with true joy, peace, and purpose.
Showing appreciation to others and to ourselves is characterized by gratitude. Gratitude makes us more aware of the sources of hope, joy, and wonder in our lives. Being grateful can improve your health, strengthen relationships, and help manage your finances.
Here are just some of the financial benefits of practicing gratitude:
IMPROVING PATIENCE
Practicing gratitude can affect your patience. Researchers found that feelings of gratitude reduced financial impatience, according to a study published in Psychological Science journal. Those who showed gratitude had increased willingness to wait longer to receive their money. While those who wrote about neutrality tended to opt for immediate payouts.
REDUCING DESIRE FOR MATERIAL THINGS
Psychologists Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough showed that people who counted their blessings had a more positive outlook in life, exercised more, and were more likely to help others. These findings were supported by Psychologist Nathaniel Lambert who found that feelings of gratitude were associated with lower materialism.
Feeling thankful for what you have can enhance your satisfaction in life and reduce your desire to buy more things. Think about that!
INCREASING GENEROSITY
As said above, generosity can increase the likelihood of helping others. The goal of financial planning is to allocate money towards things that you value most, which can be the welfare of others. Gratitude was shown to motivate people to pay it forward or to give back in many ways including financially.
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An article published by the American Psychological Association reported that gratitude facilitates generosity. People who were feeling gratitude were able to share more money with others, despite the recipient being a stranger.
BOOSTING YOUR EMOTIONS
When it comes to gratitude, the first step is to acknowledge the gifts and benefits we have received. Secondly, you must recognize that you have been blessed by others, luck, or divine intervention.
Gratitude requires us to see how we have been supported and affirmed by other people. In return, it can make us feel satisfied and secure.
HELPING COUPLES WITH MONEY FIGHTS
A 2015 study by researchers at the University of Georgia found that gratitude can help couples to manage financial conflicts. Expressing appreciation and feeling appreciated are hallmarks of strong partnership, according to couples’ therapist Ed Coambs.
Ed said:
“In a flourishing, healthy relationship, gratitude flows naturally and pretty easily. In a functioning relationship, it’s more intermittent, a little less consistent. In a dysfunctional relationship, it’s absent.”
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Many financial conflicts stem from partners not feeling appreciated for their efforts to save money and to look after the couples’ future. This is where gratitude can come in.
Anna Agoncillo
Celeste Elle
