4 Tips to Deal with Debt When Married

“Home life ceases to be free and beautiful as soon as it is founded on borrowing and debt.” – Henrik Isben

One of the most common issues that individuals bring into a marriage is debt. Money is high on the list of topics that couples fight about, and it is the among the top reasons why couples get divorced. Financial issues increase marital discord and stress.

If you are worried about marrying someone with debt, you must realize that you can help each other out. You are a team!

#1: BE TRANSPARENT ABOUT YOUR DEBT

Be honest about your debt situation. Hiding debt from your spouse before the wedding is simply a horrible idea. Your partner needs to know your economic situation and vice versa. You can only make shared decisions after talking about money.

#2: CREATE DECISIONS AS A TEAM

Married individuals have many financial arrangements to make. After discussing your pre-existing debt, decide how you will move forward together. Consider the following questions:

a. How will each partner contribute to the household bank balance?
b. Are you going to combine assets by opening a joint account?
c. What kind of investments will you make?
d. How do you plan to tackle previous debt?

#3: SET A MONEY DISCUSSION NIGHT

The key to surviving marriage and debt is to set a budget as a team. Find a quiet place and sit down for a discussion before next month begins. It may seem like a simple solution, but it is the answer to many money issues in marriage.

#4: NEVER PLAY THE BLAME GAME

Once you are married, you must work together to eliminate your debt. “My” debt turns to “our” debt. Having this perspective creates a significant difference.

an asian couple arguing

Image Credits: Asia Wedding Network

#5: CONSIDER PERSONAL LOAN TO RELIEVE SOME FINANCIAL BURDEN

Prudent use of personal loans can save you more in the long run, especially if you’re currently saddled with severe credit card debt or are facing a financial emergency that could wipe out your savings. Ultimately, the only way to prevent bad debt from snowballing is to have the discipline to control your spending until your loan is repaid. If you find yourself in any of the above situations and are looking for a personal loan to help relieve some of your financial burden, be one of the first 2 applicants daily to have your 1st year’s interest (up to S$550) covered by SingSaver. Click here to learn more. Offer until 21st Mar 2022. T&Cs apply.

Stick to the plan and motivate each other. Living without debt is not easy, but it is worth it.

Sources: 1 & 2

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Inexpensive Alternatives to Diamond Rings

You are one step closer to the aisle. Congratulations! Tradition dictates that you pop the question with a ring. With the variety of engagement rings in Singapore, how will you find the “perfect” one?

Diamonds are considered a classic choice for engagement rings. You see, diamonds are one of the strongest naturally occurring substances on earth and are capable of withstanding almost anything. It symbolizes the kind of commitment that comes with marriage. However, diamond rings may not be the best choice for everyone. If you are looking for a less expensive or a more unique engagement ring, you may consider a diamond alternative instead. Look at these five beautiful gemstones that can suit your partner’s taste!

#1: RUBY

Classic and bold are words that encapsulate the beauty of rubies. Ruby is the gemstone of love. Its visually pleasing color comes in shades of deep pink to red. It makes a wonderful contrast when paired with yellow or white metals.

Suitable for everyday wear, rubies are certainly durable. When it comes to its price, ruby is not as inexpensive as the other gemstones. Rubies are priced higher per carat than any other colored gems.

#2: MOISSANITE

In the past several years, moissanite has become increasingly popular as a diamond alternative. It not only resembles a diamond, but also sells at a fraction of the price of the diamond. Active brides can benefit from the durability of moissanite gemstones. After all, moissanites are the second hardest gemstone used in jewelry making today.

#3: AQUAMARINE

Looking for your “something blue”? Opt for a serene and elegant choice such as the light blue aquamarine. Part of the beryl family, aquamarine can be a beautiful family heirloom. Just ensure that you keep it separately from other jewels and polish it over the years. With its hardness rating of 7.5-8, aquamarine can be scratched by diamonds and sapphires.

#4: EMERALD

With its glistening green hue, emeralds are a gorgeous choice for an engagement ring. Emeralds are customizable. It comes in a variety of shapes and sizes to easily fit your dream ring.

Like aquamarine, emeralds have a hardness rating of about 7.5. Thus, it will require a little more attention and care when being stored or worn. The most appealing emeralds come in deep green with a highly transparent appearance.

#5: SAPPHIRE

Sapphire is a precious gemstone known for its elegance and durability. Sapphires are one of the hardest diamond alternatives and are ideal for everyday wear. It is made to last a lifetime. Moreover, there is less upkeep with these gemstones.

Sapphires are usually less expensive than diamonds of similar carat weight and shape. Because of this, white sapphires are highly sought after as an alternative to diamonds for engagement rings. Couples who are eager to maximize the size of the center stone while staying within a budget can opt for a sapphire.

Image Credits: pixabay.com

As you start this life-changing journey, remember what the ring symbolizes for you and your partner. As J.W. Lord put into writing:

“A wedding ring is a symbol of commitment; a promise, a pledge, and a vow. The promise is to forsake all others, to stay devoted and true; the pledge is to honor that promise selflessly, to see the whole thing through; and the vow is to keep that pledge unwaveringly, until the days are few. It is a mutual agreement to become one instead of two.”

Sources: 1 & 2

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4 Common Financial Problems In Long-Term Partnerships

Arguments about finances hamper many marriages and professional partnerships. It is no wonder that financial problems are the leading cause of divorce.

A committed couple who suffers from serious monetary problems typically face loads of stress and tension, which often translates to heated quarrels. Prevent a fueled fight by fully disclosing your financial circumstance to your partner. From time to time, check if your financial goals are still in sync.

#1: STUCK IN DEBT

From school loans to gambling addiction, many people come to the altar bearing their financial baggage. If a partner has an outstanding pile of debt and the other does not, this situation can ignite a conflict.

In such situations, people often take solace in knowing that debts are not carried over through the marriage. However, it is understandable to share the responsibilities over childcare and housing debts.

Acknowledging what you are getting yourself into can help you employ various strategies to pay off debt. Both partners must be non-judgmental and honest when discussing about their financial habits and debts. Use several tools and strategies soon after. Seek professional help when necessary.

#2: DIFFERENCES IN MONEY PERSONALITIES

Tension brought by money can be due to the opposing personalities and beliefs of two people. Personality towards money plays an important role in a couple’s marital bliss or lack thereof.

Imagine living in a home with a hoarder when you are a spender yourself. Or, living with someone who is risk-avoidant while you are a risk-taker. These opposing personalities can be mediated by empathy and compassion. Walk in the other person’s shoes to understand where he or she is coming from. Paying attention to your partner’s financial habits before and during matrimony can be beneficial too. Discuss about your financial views and habits to reach a level of understanding.

#3: LEVELS OF COMMITMENT

Whether the spotlight is on a romantic or a professional partnership, the commitment levels of each individual can be an issue. You need to clearly discuss what each partner is looking for. Let us take a business partnership as an example. Partner A wants to keep his full-time job and invest some funds to the business, while Partner B wants to fully dedicate his time and resources towards the business. Can you see the gap between these two?

When it comes to romantic relationships, two people may not be on the same page when it comes to commitment. Partner A wants to start a family, while Partner B is not yet ready. It is important to discuss the commitment levels before it is too late.

#4: DIFFERENCES IN FINANCIAL CONTRIBUTIONS

The nature of partnership is a struggle that many partnerships face. After all, not every partnership is split 50/50. The differences in financial contributions can yield many questions such as how the profits will be divided (i.e., professional partnership) or how clear these financial responsibilities are (i.e., romantic partnership).

These questions must be addressed at the end of the courting period. Thus, both parties will aim to eliminate lingering tensions as they move forward.

Sources: 1 & 2

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Financial Responsibilities Of Newly Married Couples

Managing your finances together is one of the most important roles you partake on in a marriage.

Differing views and attitudes towards money can pose issues to a relationship. For instance, you may seem frugal to others and stingy to her. If you both live beyond your means and spend lavishly on each other, you might find yourselves trapped in debt. There is time to change. Planning ahead as a team can help you build a strong foundation for your marriage.

1. GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER

Get to know each other’s financial beliefs and spending habits. Understand where your partner is coming from and adapt if necessary. If your partner is a spender, agree on establishing some limits. If your partner is prudent, agree on the things you would like to prioritize. Make your expectations clear to arrive on the same page.

“The handling of finances is one of the major emotional battlegrounds of any marriage. Lack of finances is seldom the issue. The root of the problem seems to be an unrealistic and immature view of money.” – David Augsburger, The Meaning of Money in Marriage

2. DELEGATING FINANCIAL DUTIES

Assess the differences in your income and money management strengths to determine how to divide the financial duties. Delegate the person who is financially savvier to take the role of managing your family’s investment options. While, the person who is better at budgeting can take charge of managing the household bills. Take advantage of each other’s strengths and fill the gaps in between.

3. PROVIDING SOLELY FOR YOUR FAMILY

For families with a sole breadwinner, it is practical to maintain an adequate emergency fund to withstand unexpected financial woes. Please consider the number of dependents when finalizing the amount of money to be set aside.

Single income couples should consider helping each other in terms of their CPF responsibilities. You can top up your spouse’s CPF account, especially if he or she has low CPF balances. You can transfer your CPF Ordinary Account savings after setting aside the Basic Retirement Sum in your own CPF account.

4. SHARING BANK ACCOUNTS

There is no one size fits all! Your household arrangement depends on your marital assets, income levels, and financial commitments. Think about which expenses you want to keep separate and which you want to share. You open a joint account for their household bills. Set aside a specific amount monthly to grow your joint account together. Meanwhile, you can keep your own individual accounts to fund your own spending.

5. AVOIDING FINANCIAL INFIDELITY

Financial infidelity refers to hiding financial information behind your partner’s back. Failing to mention a significant expenditure to your spouse may cause problems in the long run. Top money lies include under-declaring one’s income or hiding one’s debts. Such dishonesty can diminish the level of trust between a couple.

6. WORKING ON SAME FINANCIAL GOALS

Find a way to work on shared financial goals. Agree on the amount of personal contributions depending on your income.  Some of the common themes that most financial goals share are having a budget, living frugally, getting out of debt, and having a good credit score. Do not forget to save for your emergency fund and retirement plans.

Image credits: pixabay.com

You are in this (wild ride) together!

Sources: 1 & 2

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Stuck At Home Valentine’s Day Ideas

Romance does not have to fade just because you are at home. Considering the impact of the pandemic and the need to practice social distancing, you have probably struggled to keep your indoor dates exciting. Fret not! There are a myriad of creative date activities that you can enjoy right in the comfort of your own home.

Spend Valentine’s Day with your special someone with these fun ideas.

#1: DO YOGA TOGETHER

Stretch the night away by practicing couples yoga with your partner. Now is the time find your inner Zen. Poses suitable for couples are more intimate and challenging. It is a shared experience focused more on the connection with one another, rather than just yourself.

#2: MAKE DELICIOUS PIZZA

Add spice to your Netflix and chill by making your own pizza. Try different recipes such as baguette pizza and Marinara pizza.

#3: TEST YOUR SINGING ABILITIES

Do you have a favorite love song? Challenge your partner to a melodious night of karaoke. Sing your hearts out by searching karaoke videos on YouTube. Singing some of your favorite tunes is guaranteed to boost your spirit.

#4: TRY A VIRTUAL MUSEUM TOUR

Whether you are a fan of Vincent van Gogh or cultural art, you can find a virtual museum tour for both of your interests. I recommend watching the National Museum of Singapore’s Zoom Into History Video series. It is an insightful look at the artifacts and everyday objects that have defined our nation’s past. You can also watch the virtual tours streamed on the National Gallery of Singapore’s Facebook Live.

#5: CREATE FUN COCKTAILS

Show off your bartending skills in the comfort of your own space by making a cocktail together with your loved one. Make the Love Potion #9. It is made with gin, lemon juice, simple syrup, and pomegranate juice. Enjoy!

#6: START A BOOK CLUB

Encourage your friends to join your book club. Bring your partner along too. Choose a book to read together with the group and then pick an evening to discuss it over wine and cheese on Zoom or Skype.

#7: HAVE A PHOTOSHOOT

Spare a few hours for an at-home photoshoot. Ensure that your pictures have backdrops and decorations that fit your theme. You can have these photos printed and gathered into an album.

#8: SET THEMATIC NIGHTS

Whether you want to indulge on a game or movie night, you can set February 14 as your “best day ever”. You can forgo dinner by turning the lights out and preparing snacks that can boost your movie night experience. If you cannot agree on a movie you both want to watch, consider the first movie you ever watched together. Alternatively, you can play video games. Your partner can either be impressed by your mad skills on screen or will think it is adorable to see you consistently losing.

#9: INDULGE IN A SPA DATE

Drop in your nearest Lush outlet or create your own DIY bath bombs to enjoy a spa date. Have a bath together with bath salts and bath bombs. Afterwards, you can give each other massages with aromatherapy oils. Lastly, you can give your partner a manicure or a pedicure. Complete the experience with matching robes!

Image credits: pixabay.com

Sources: 1 & 2

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