How To Spend Money Using The 5 Love Languages

Making a conscious effort to speak your partner’s love language allows you to understand each other better and to make him or her feel loved. Dr. Gary Chapman is the renowned author of the “5 Love Languages”. He highlights that there are five ways that we can communicate love namely through: words of affirmation, receiving gifts, quality time, acts of service, or physical touch.

With the continued practice of communicating each other’s love language, a happy and loving relationship will solidify.

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION

People who have “words of affirmation” as their love language value sweet and encouraging words. To them, whispering “I love you” brings more happiness than any expensive give that you can buy. On the other hand, they will feel unappreciated if you do not verbally convey your emotions or if you do not praise them for their accomplishments.

This person will appreciate a handwritten card. A book can be a good choice too. Moreover, you may gift an artwork or a decorative sign with empowering or loving words in it.

RECEIVING GIFTS

For some people, receiving gifts make them feel most appreciated. This does not mean that they are materialistic. They simply love the thought behind every gift. They have special fondness for special occasions such as birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries. Forgetting the special dates and not showing you care can become issues to these people.

If your loved one has this as his or her love language, spend your money on a gift that is important and personal. Buy something that has special significance to your relationship. Also, pay attention to any hints your partner drops.

ACTS OF SERVICE

For many people, actions speak louder than words. To make your partner with this love language feel loved, help him or her with the household chores or with anything that will ease one’s burden. Laziness, broken commitments, and creating more work for them indicates that their feelings do not matter.

Serve your partner by giving a set of “love coupons”. These coupons may contain the following acts: free housecleaning services or free candlelit dinner. Do all the planning and preparing!

QUALITY TIME

For this people, they find the greatest gesture of love in spending undivided attention with the ones they love. It does not matter where you take your partner! What matters most is that you listen actively and you are free from any distractions.

Consider booking a weekend getaway with just the two of you. If it is a family member, go out for a dinner or roam the Botanical Gardens. Make sure you spend an ample amount of time with your loved one. Do not make him or her feel rushed.

PHYSICAL TOUCH

Lastly, people who have physical touch as their love language value appropriate gestures such as holding hands or hugs. If your significant other speaks this language, it is important to appreciate them through your touch. Physical touch fosters a sense of security and care in any relationship. Neglect or abuse can be unforgivable for this people.

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An ideal gift for this person is a massage or manicure. Another option is to book a cuddle session at home while watching Netflix in bed and drinking some hot chocolate.

Sources: 1 & 2

 

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Budget-Friendly Ways To Spice Up Your Love Life

Does money and partnership mix well in the game of love? I have to admit, intimacy can be expressed in different ways. Some people showcase their affection through the money and the gems it can buy. Nonetheless, your financial well-being affects your intimate relationship.

Put a spotlight on your finances to increase your bond this 2020.

PAY YOURSELF FIRST

Much has been said about loving oneself first, before loving another. I cannot stress how your capacity to love affects the way you behave in the relationship. Think of it as sourcing water from either a full or an empty pail. The same sentiment applies to paying yourself first.

Aim to grow a robust savings first, before extending your funds to your partner or spouse. I know how tempting it is to invest all your money in your business or your family. So, start small and gradually increase the amount that you will keep for yourself.

CREATE A PLEASURE ACCOUNT

When you and your partner continue to deprive yourselves on a regular basis, you will find yourselves overspending at some point. Avoid being caught in this situation by determining your couple goals and saving for these.

Aside from setting aside a portion for yourself, you must allocate money for the both of you. Use your “pleasure account” to fund entertaining activities that both of you will enjoy. You each must put an amount that is fair to you and your partner.

GO ON FRUGAL DATES

Dates should not always be lavish and expensive. You can spice up the romance by indulging on frugal dates such as a movie-night at home or having a rooftop dinner.

You can also take your partner out for some outdoor activities. Spend some time in nature to refresh your mind and body. You can go to the nearby parks, nature trails, or the Sentosa beach. Keep things simple by unplugging completely whenever possible. Cycling or jogging around can give you a whole new bonding experience. Take this time to immerse yourselves in the present and in the company of each other.

DISCUSS MONEY OPENLY

Open communication without judgment is the best way to work through challenges without fostering resentment. Do not let your partner’s unpleasant feelings build up by communicating crucial parts about your finances.

Image Credits: pixabay.com

Discuss your current debt and professional state at least once a month. Go over your finances to determine your financial problems and figure out how to solve these problems. Moreover, you must plan out how you will achieve your financial goals. This will strengthen your relationship in the long run.

Sources: 1 & 2

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How To Plan A Wedding Without Getting Fired

For many people, planning a wedding can be a time-exhausting task. It can feel like you are taking another full-time job on top of your current one. Do not fret just yet!

Proper organization, delegation, and time segregation can keep you sane throughout the planning process. Not to mention, you will still be able to keep your beloved job!

ORGANIZATION

To keep the boat afloat, organization is the key! You can either organize your wedding tasks traditionally (i.e., using paper and pen) or digitally (i.e., using computer software and apps). Traditionally, you must keep your wedding tasks and calendar in one notebook. Do not forget to give your partner a copy! Fortunately for you, you can easily update your partner or your wedding squad by creating a digital file.

Image Credits: pixabay.com

Go digital to enjoy the ease of accessing your wedding tasks while you are at work or while you are on the go! Google Drive, its computer software and its phone app, is a good option to seamlessly keep everyone on the wedding planning loop. Remember to use your personal email when getting back and forth with the suppliers and other people. You do not want to use the company’s email to complain about your supplier!

DELEGATION

Whether you like it or not, your career should remain your top priority during the wedding planning process. As such, you must turn to your friends and relatives for help. Treat wedding planning similarly as a big project in the office. Delegate wedding tasks to your wedding squad and provide everyone with a clear description of what they are responsible for. Pass the tasks that you know they will be great! Then, keep the communication lines open to review their works.

It is more efficient to split the delegation with your partner by creating a wedding checklist that includes proposed deadlines. These deadlines will help you to accomplish everything on time.

TIME SEGREGATION

Time management begins by scheduling your couple calendar according to your wedding tasks. This way, you will know you set aside the necessary time to tackle important matters. Moreover, you will be able to set your phone’s alarm to keep track of everything.

Image Credits: pixabay.com

Now, let us go to your downtime. Maximize the time you spent on commuting or relaxing by setting appointments with your wedding suppliers or by finalizing some details. It is better to search Facebook or Instagram with a goal in mind!

Sources: 1 & 2

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Financial Intimacy: How To Mix Love With Money

Relationships and investing are both complicated and mixing the two can either be a home run or a recipe for disaster. As Michelle Singletary, author of Your Money and Your Man: How You and Prince Charming Can Spend Well and Live Rich, once said:

“Couples want to know should they have his, hers, or ours, or all of the above. They’re not sure how to manage it. And that’s where a lot of the arguments come in, especially if there is uneven income earning between the two.”

Sometimes an individual may feel like a child receiving an allowance from his or her spouse, but it turns out that the person simply cannot handle money well. The situation can be resolved if both parties begin to be accountable for their money. Aside from this, here are some tips to boost your financial intimacy:

1. INTERVIEW EACH OTHER

Upon entering a serious relationship, you must discuss about your perspectives on money, spending habits, and sharing costs. This will make talks about financial issues easier as time goes by – especially if you are planning to spend the rest of your lives together.

For couples who are about to get married, you must touch on the long-term subjects such as how to enhance your credit scores, how to address retirement, how lavish your wedding ceremony will be, and how do you plan to manage your money.

2. BE COMPLETELY HONEST

Regardless of whether you have joint or separate bank accounts, you must always be honest to your partner about your current financial situation and your ideal financial situation. Tell him or her about your purchases, debts, income, assets and other things that are in your account/s right now. As for your ideal financial situation, relay your future plans such as having annual overseas trips.

Financial intimacy entails full disclosure about your finances including knowing what documents are signed and where the records are kept.

3. SEEK OUTSIDE HELP

When it comes to marriage, you become half of a legal and financial partnership once you say “I do!” This is why Premarital Counseling incorporating a strong financial component is a great help. If you are deciding to purchase a condo or an HDB through your CPF accounts, the financial professional will guide you to good credit score and substantial amount of savings. An accountant during the first year of marriage is also helpful as your taxes can get complicated during the transition from single to married.

Image Credits: pixabay.com (CC0 Public Domain)

Image Credits: pixabay.com (CC0 Public Domain)

Sources: 1,2, & 3

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Singaporeans, Must You Discuss Your Salary To Your Spouse?

If you were tasked to participate in a television game show to test your knowledge about your spouse, how well do you think you will do? Getting your spouse’s full name correctly is easy. But will you still get it correctly if you were asked about your spouse’s exact income?

According to a 2015 survey by Fidelity Mutual, 43% of the participants had no clue about each other’s earnings. The percentage of couples who were ignorant about their incomes have grown compared to the survey 3 years ago. Furthermore, 1 in 10 people was off by US$25,000 (S$33,700). This is no laughing matter.

You cannot blame these numbers on poor communication alone as the ever-changing economy may also be the malefactor. A shift in the workplace is seen as many employees become freelancers while others work on multiple jobs with unpredictable hours (much like Uber drivers). If your spouse belongs to the cluster of people whose income is relatively unpredictable, you still have to be informed.

Asking anyone how much they make is a taboo subject especially in our Asian culture but if you are planning to spend the rest of your lives with the person, you have the right to know. Your annual household income dictates how you are able to save and your quality of life in general. Knowing each others’ assets and liabilities can help plan your future well (including your plan for retirement).

To put that in perspective, you have to realize that our lives are filled with uncertainties. Emergency expenses, hospitalization fees due to chronic illness, loss of a spouse and unemployment can affect your finances. You have to be prepared. This is why it is vital that married couples communicate and cooperate in managing their finances no matter how much they earn.

As you begin to open up about this subject, it can be uncomfortable for some and fight-inducing for others. Given the extent to which our society judges the person based on how much they earn, this particular subject is susceptible to dangers. Dangers that the other person can feel insecure, frustrated or inferior. But as Richard Vondra, the first Vice-President of Spire Investment Management, once said: “You don’t have to be rich, but you do need to make sure you’re able to support each other.”

Beyond your fear of being judged, knowing your spouse’s income is one of the most basic elements of your finances.  Moreover, it may just be the key to your marital bliss! Studies have shown that the happiest couples talk about money and stay out of debt.

Image Credits: pixabay.com (CC0 Public Domain)

Image Credits: pixabay.com (CC0 Public Domain)

Ask yourself: “Will having this financial information change my life?” Then take action based on your answer.

Sources:  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, & 6

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