I’ve heard many people telling me:
“Doing things alone? So lonely leh.”
But my stance is, why not?
Doing things alone is not that scary, at least for me. But most significantly, it brings about a range of benefits that would make you wish you’d started earlier.
Peace with yourself
I’m kinda on the extreme side so I’ll try to tone things down just for this article.
I mean, I am almost 99% against doing things with someone else because being alone is so liberating.
Call it inner peace or whatever you like, I find myself better able to tune in to my thoughts when I’m on my own. Being with another person can be fun for some, but when it comes to decision-making, the pressure to “heed” someone else’s advice is suffocating.
Outer pressures are so not my thing. If you like that top, or that pants, or have ice kachang for breakfast, then just do it. Why hesitate because of a passing comment or feedback that shouldn’t matter?
The freedom is unmatched
I sound like a loner but don’t get me wrong.
Wait, what’s wrong with being a loner? Ha!
The freedom that comes with being alone and doing things alone is unrivaled. You make the call, do something new, arrive at decisions out of your comfort zone, and just live life on your terms.
Trust me, there are mental health benefits to it. Yes, being sociable has its fair share of advantages too. But being surrounded by people all the time makes you immune to things. Maybe you’ve been a follower all your life, but having a buddy who has exceptional “leadership qualities” has had you slump into being an extreme follower.
Maybe you think that there’s nothing wrong with that but look at it in hindsight, that’s probably the reason why you haven’t been able to go out and do things alone. It’s scary because you’ve been a “follower” all your life. It’s better to let someone else lead the way, take the initiative, and whatever BS.
This has to stop.
Start traveling the world solo
Reminds me of BLACKPINK Jennie’s ‘SOLO’.
A little out of context but the chorus is so fitting.
You shine when you go solo. And that’s so liberating. The best part? You get to take on solo trips abroad, breaking past the walls of our little red dot. No more waiting for friends to match their annual leave to go on vacation together.
I’ve written an entirely separate post on the magic of solo traveling 3 days ago:
Discover the magic of solo traveling
Click through to read if you’re interested.
You’re welcome.
You only stand to gain from being alone
I’m not going to lie, being alone for the first time (or the first few times) can be quite scary. But after X times, I’m immune to those stares.
I’m not asking you to sever ties with your pals and just be that loner no one wants to talk to. I’m asking you to give it a try if you’re so used to doing things in pairs or groups.
Taking a break from social interactions can be healthy. You know the sort that shoots out negative comments with their ever-toxic mind and mouth? Gossiping can be fun but give it an overdose and you can’t wait to leave that gathering.
And as we’re approaching the end of this post, just know that being alone is not sad or pathetic. It’s your social cells screaming:
“Give me a break, can?”
Doing things alone is not that scary. Or is it? Only you can give yourself an honest response after you’ve tried and tested it. Give yourself an opportunity to break away from being a follower (or a leader) in a group setting, and the need to ponder over other people’s opinions on your decisions. Take the time to please yourself and not go with the flow for once (or twice, or many times) and you will probably not look back ever again.